the #parish weekend away - 10 tips

The parish we are in where my wife is a curate very fortunately invited us to their weekend away before my other half started in her curate post.  Here are 10 tips for using such an opportunity well - if you're lucky enough to get one. 

1) get used to being introduced as "xxx's husband" - and have ready a potted summary of what you do, your family etc. etc. (as you will be asked these type of questions a lot) 

2) get good at asking the right questions - so you can learn and remember some key things about each person you're introduced to

3) split up from your spouse and join different groups/sit at different tables - that way you double between you how many people you and your other half can meet

4) work out a way to remember names and faces and info - for the weekend we attended all attendees were provided with a list of who was at the weekend.  This was very useful as the other half and I got into the habit of taking a quick break after each meal on the weekend to share info on who we had each met and who between us we hadn't met

5) sharing info - in comparing notes on who we had met we fairly quickly ran into the issue of what info others have given one of you that you should not share with the other half.  We decided that we'd rely on each others judgement about what sensitive info we should not share with each other (sensitive ='s stuff somebody would reasonably assume you wouldn't share with others)

6) take some photos of the group when it is together  - (e.g. mealtimes)  - especially if there isn't a planned group photo - this can be very useful in keeping a record you can use to remember who is who.

7) if you meet any retired clergy spouses ask them for their top tip - you might not get an immediate answer, but they'll probably come and find you later to give you some advice.

8) if you're the more noisy confident one - then you may want to throttle it back a bit when you are meeting people with your other half.

9) don't start volunteering for stuff - I told people I intended to not do so for at least the 1st 3 months so I could get a feel for where i might be most useful in the new church.

10) if there isn't a weekend away - then see if there is some sort of other church event you could attend to make some basic introductions with the "keen" ones so when you pitch up there are some people you know.